Shades of Blue

----

2008-02-12T23:11:00.000-08:00

just finished o8th ms team, didnt know there was an extra episode at the end. twas beautiful.
Mobile Suit Gundam should really take a more realistic approach after 00. It was amazing how much 08th makes you care about both sides, zeon is just badass with all their cool mobile suits but you dont want any of the main characters to die.

been making some more gundam plamos too. just built 3 recently, custom gouf, hi-zack, and gundam dyname. next is the armored core.

I feel oddly exhausted at the moment, maybe the ending of 08th was that peaceful. gotta finish an outline for psychology since i missed the first 2. math teacher was absent today. could practice japanese more, play ACE2 some more. hmmm, this is good enough.

having the chance to be with some friends and not worry is the best right now. its worth the while.

btw, finally posted some more pics on myspace, im sure youve seen them if you ever read this. their soon to show up in this blog anyways.

goodnight.

can has bionic eye?

2008-02-08T02:35:00.000-08:00

holly shit. models, hurt eye.

yea, these mobile suits are "models" not toys huh? that changes everything. anyone can snap pieces together. the one in the pic took me hours. and its extremely small. well, ive learned that the stickers a VERY important and yes, detailing makes all the difference. i cant believe how damn small that thing is! it took forever!

ill be sticking with HG models for a while, i cringe every time i look at my craptastic gelgoog. for my 1st time Really trying id say it turned out pretty good.

actual pictures soon to come. night.

been a while

2008-02-05T01:15:00.000-08:00

well well well. whats happened since last i posted? i hung out with marvin, got overloaded by so many things at his house, kind of ruined the fun. o yea, we watched rambo, to put it simply that movie isnt good but its very entertaining. got some more ps2 games burned, most noticeably ACE2 which i have the controls pretty much like in ZOE2 so that game is freaking god like right now. romel wrote me a whole bunch of stuff i can use for my essay rough draft, thankfully he likes writing. finally called in and paid for my ps3 repair. ordered an armored core 4 tellus model and a 5pc set of air gear figures since ive finished the show, although there must be a 2nd season coming.

ill probly go with marvin and kevin while they job hunt, i should look too but i dont want a job yet. oh! and im planning on going to japan with them too! this summer for 5weeks. just gotta have some paperwork filled out by the 28th and have 300$ deposit and apply for my passport....o yea, and practice japanese for real.

i may talk about some things more in depth but for now im going to eat and then go to bed, still gotta get my rough draft in order and put the finishing touches on my math homework.

soon.

Stanly (Cats)

2008-01-31T12:56:00.001-08:00

seems ive bad luck with cats now that i think about it. just had to throw stanly out at 5am today, she pissed on the couch again. what the hell did i just do?? i put her outside!? sure i cried, but, i seem to have gotten over it a little, which seems horrible. i was alot like her too, she was always scared and slept in my bed and ran away from challenges. she wont make it outside, if i see her, well, i couldnt take it.

so my first cat, amber had similar urinary problems, tho she was much older and my stepdad claimed he was allergic to cats, she had to stay outside and the neighbors took care of her. to see her like that was show sad, she could hardly meow. that cat was around when my mom and dad were still together. we got stanly (left) and sebastian (right) at about the same time a couple years before we moved to california. sebastian was my favorite, he was a cat that just didnt give a crap, dogs, bugs people, he was really laid back. later he got sick and got better once but later it got worse, he also had urinary problems but its much more common in persian cats. i cant stand to think of him in his last days, he had to wear one of those cones so he wouldnt lick off his stiches and ointment. at the vet they eventually found out that he had tumors and was beyond saving so he was put down. now stanly was kicked out, i dont even know if i should feed her, earl might do something if she hangs around the house. but if i dont shes going to die most likely, unless someone else feeds her, she cant be outside like that, after all, she slept in my bed a whole hell of alot. i really love cats, but what tragic events, im sure ill love them still.

...i quit work this morning too, my moms pissed im sure, but i need to be with friends right now.

i went with marvin and kevin last tuesday to the anime club, bought some manga, posters and a small gundam model. swap magic works, yay.

maybe ill talk more about it later, but im going over to marvins soon.

please dont hate me kitties, i loved you all.

Still here

2008-01-28T16:46:00.000-08:00

it seems the blog is going to be updated every 1-3 days. romel mentioned that you shouldnt force yourself to post all the time if nothing important happens, good point.

got off work at 4 today, i was really close to quitting but my mom talked me into staying this last week, well, school is at 6-10 tonight, a pc class. been watching alot of air gear, that show seems so fresh, and playing SRW in random obsessive bursts, after becoming completely familiar with all the units its extremely fun.

well, i guess nothing exciting has happened but, food is ready! yayy!

Dead Zone

2008-01-25T11:30:00.003-08:00

work today 2-10pm than sat. close and 7am the next day, damn. almost one more week of this crap. romel better be ready to hangout with me more, if not, i suppose i can find somwhere to wander too.

btw, anyone try monster mixxd? it taste like some dark berry shit, blehh, it might get better though, wonder what flavor is next?

air gear, that show is fucking amazing! its so cool i actually want to rollerblade in real life! but not speed skating, and not aggresive "grind fest" skating, it would just be really cool to navigate through an urban area and keep speed up while looking cool. ive seen tons of videos of people grinding but id like to grind something then still haul ass and keep going.

wasnt sure what else i was gonna write about...hmmm, ack, id better keep in mind my rough draft, damn essays!

dont wanna sleep

2008-01-23T23:49:00.000-08:00

psychology today was pretty interesting, the teacher maria lopez is apparently pretty famous as far as msjc teachers go, having participated in a famous Latino movement with chaves and gained many honors for her teaching. the whole time we just listened to her talk about herself, although she used it as an example for some basic ideas and so we understand her and how she teaches. the whole room made me feel dizzy, maybe its due to the fact that i barely made it their in time or that i sat to close or the size of the room or even the bright lights. it was interesting but i feel like i fully understand these very basic ideas. although what i do know has no framework so i feel lost all the time, as if everything is right and wrong, good and bad. we got out early and the whole class flew by very quickly.

alas, ive work tomorrow at 8am, damn it! itll be very weird going back to work, knowing im quitting and that ive been off for 2 days, hopefully nothing bad happens, damn ungrateful customers.

got my gundam markers today too! but ill have to wait till im not working anymore to even mess with that stuff, or my doujin games, or my japanese study, or anything else.

one more thing i found out, i shouldnt talk about personal business on here but to put it simply, im going to receive a lil over ** in about a month, aside from my ** inheritance when i turn 21. please dont come to my house and rob me k? not like i have my address here though. its so shocking, some people may feel all like "HELLS YES!, PARTY TIME" but i can use it wisely. ill put 1k into my checking and save the rest, all i really wanna buy is a laptop (finally!) and a motorcycle scooter, although i need to get my license and practice a whole lot. i dont want to let this spoil me but it puts me at ease, ill be able to focus on socializing, if i cant than the money is even more worthless.

this is the best chance ill have to grow, by being with friends, lets do it!

the situation may improve

2008-01-23T14:39:00.000-08:00

well, yesterday was my 1st day of college. i had English from 1-450pm, although we got out early. for as long as we were there, it didn't seem like we did anything really, looked over the syllabus, introduced ourselves (discovered no one has anything in common with me), did a small assignment, took a few notes and found out about our 1st assignment. we have to have a rough draft of a descriptive essay, with at least 5 paragraphs and one line of dialog, i might write about the japan expo since i have such bad memory of past events. the one thing i have to make sure i do is just write, not sit there and brainstorm forever. anyways, the class had a few breaks and its right across from the bookstore so thats cool.

after that class i called my mom and romel, went into the library and ending up checking out a "guide to philosophy" book. wandered around for a bit, then bought a big ass bowl of ramen in the gas-station esque college store, got some hot chocolate too for only .45$. unfortunately i didn't find out about the clubs since the asb office was closed by the time i found it, though im sure you can call them or something. math class was ok too, the teacher seemed like your typical strict math teacher but she was just really tired and goofy. it sucks that all the people in that class are adults though, damn.

well, ive got psychology today at 7-950pm, its next to my math room it seems, that class better kick ass too. so far it seems even harder to meet people at a place like that, although i plan on joining a club there, they should have an anime club.

the remnants of my last 2 work weeks is gonna suck, i asked for less hours and they gave me 41 hours instead! bullcrap! and on top of that i work tomorrow from 8-5 (1hour overtime!) and then close on Saturday till 1am then work at 7am, thats insane, isn't there some kind of law against that!? well, ill be glad to quit that damn place, flexible times my ass. everyone just works full time unless they're minors. it'll be nice to be done with it though, id still want a part time job but just like, a few days a week, although unless i get my license and a ca..er motorcycle or scooter than im kind of screwed. but maybe ill wait till summer to get a job, ill enjoy the time to try and see people more, and hopefully do more in school.

as for now ive just been playing some more super robot wars. ive decided the best way to play the series since i dont know japanese, im going to finish SRW original generation 1&2 on gba since their in english, than SRW3 on SNES, luckily its translated and it apparently takes place after SRW:OG after this DC war. after that i may start SRW:alpha on ps1 via my psp, it has a partial translation, enough to make it playable but id have to read the translated script to know whats going on, and boy is this series dialog heavy! a full translation is still being made but it could be a long ass time since it gets released, as well as the next game, SRW:alpha gaiden, also on the ps1. after that i would have to downl...er import 2nd SRW:alpha on and lastly 3rd SRW:alpha on ps2 to complete the alpha timeline. one of the newer SRW relases is SRW: MX, fortunately it has a psp port but has no partial translation so it would be a challenge, its so damn beautiful though.

aside from all them mecha, kevin recommended an anime called air gear to me, basically its about roller blading on crack, they have motors in them and they haul ass and can fly sorta. the way they move is awesome though, its like igpx where they glide and skid all over the place, which is also similar to my dream concept of a game, if only they replaced the people with mecha. the music is really good so far too, very hip and techno-ish. hmm, that reminds me, when in the hell is that armored core OVA coming out!?

well, thats a good post for now, hopefully i can use my soon to be free time for something useful like socializing or studying japanese. we shall find out soon.

later.

will write

2008-01-23T01:10:00.000-08:00

in the morning, no work, school at 7pm.

soon, eh?

School

2008-01-22T10:28:00.000-08:00

well, my 1st class starts today at 1pm, english and then math, crap. it cant be that bad for a 1st day though so i shouldnt sweat. ive got almost 2hours in between classes but its not as if i dont have things to do. flashcards, ds/psp (super robot wars on the go, psp emulators ftw!) zune, or walk around the school, see if people are hanging out. gotta find out about whatever anime club they have and when it is, hopefully tomorrow since i dont work.

anyways, got home from work yesterday, stepdad was pissed about me spending money on stuff, although i save most of it and the things i do buy last a long time and provide hours of entertainment, like when i buy Unreal Tournament 3 for ps3, 50-60$ for hundreds of hours of fun, yea, big waste. walked to romels and met him at del taco, met someone who worked at mcds with me, he got fired i think, but now he makes more, thats awesome. got to romels, messed around on the pc, showed him how to order off amazon and manage his bank account online. got the newest gba emulator working on my psp, since its slim now some, older homebrew dosent work i guess.

well, hopefully college isnt to bad, maybe ill even meet someone, its possible right!?

Super Robot Wars!

2008-01-20T04:38:00.000-08:00

is freaking awesome! its good to know that every mission isnt just a "kill a crap load of enemies, now kill and this squadron, now this army, now another army" so far at least. the fact that the tv series is based exactly on the game makes it even more worth while. word is that the ps2 game might has a good chance of coming out in the US, hell yea! unfortunately all the original SRT/SRW games will never come out here, the one i tried on the psp was fucking dead sexy, but its in japanese and its a strategy game, alas, i have ACE2 to try and play soon.

good night, or, morning.

cooldown

2008-01-20T00:52:00.000-08:00

got sunday, er, today off. thank goodness.

ill try and hang out with marvin and keving, or romel again. just as long as im not alone. school also starts next tuesday, although im gonna have to deal with my work hours until i most likely quit so its more nervewrecking.

for the time being, ive got some hot chocolate, super robot wars on a gba emulator and plenty of podcasts so its all good. i really cant think of what to write about, maybe i could work on writing in college soon, its a good skill to have, but for some people, its just never their thing.

cheers to a good day twomorrow, er today again.
by-eee.

hostage

2008-01-17T06:25:00.001-08:00

well, it seems ill be waiting to see my schedule before quitting, i still plan to though. even if i only worked friday saturday sunday, i wouldnt have any time at all to see marvin or kevin, and little time to see romel.

do you know how much social interaction i have per week!? close to none, aside from my mom and people at work. now add school to the equation, unless its a fucking blast im screwed.

thats why i dont feel like doing a damn thing.

i quit

2008-01-17T00:35:00.000-08:00

or, im going too, i got home about 2omin ago and have work at 8am again, of course, that sounds like a whussy reason to quit, boo fucking hoo. thats not it, if your job makes you feel like shooting yourself in the face, or coming home and doing nothing that its a huge waste, fuck this, the money is not that fucking important.

i could use more time to attempt to get a life, anyone wanna be my friend!!??

awkward

2008-01-16T00:57:00.000-08:00

today was the most awkward day of work ever, aside from getting used to going back to work after a day off, i had too much coffee. there was this really awkward russian guy trying to get donation for some church, i might have donated but he never got to the point, besides, he was loitering. we toatally got flash mobbed, 20 people just show up out of thin air!

looked up the msjc manga/anime club, "Gensho Manga", 5-7pm on Wednesday, gotta let my boss know about my classes tomorrow. i can never seem to write all i set out to on this blog, its not supposed to be any certain way, i shouldnt have to apologize, since im doing this for myself.

i guess to feel in the mood to create, everything else needs to be in order, and it never is.

whatever. i i i i i...

lucky.

2008-01-15T12:48:00.001-08:00

what a long night, stayed up all night installing doujin, an im still not done. luckily i had monday and get sunday off, i got my debit card, payed for my college classes, bought a rug and a red and a blue sportsy long sleeved shirty thingy.

it seems frank and sons isnt open on sundays, but i got this new movie called koi no mon, about an otaku who finds love or something, its live action and it looks awesome but ill save that for sunday, if i go to marvins.

ugh, need more coffee.

college is gonna be scary, it starts tuesday, the one day i have two classes, gotta kill some time between then too. bah, itll be fine.

come on sunday!

when theres time

2008-01-13T01:58:00.000-08:00

got to spend the night at marvins the other on friday, kevin was going so he was able to pick me up, in these situations i never want to fall asleep, but when everyone runs out of steam ill sleep too.

its odd, sleeping in other peoples rooms, his room is wayyyy more comfortable than mine, and it was actually clean for once. it seems to be something about the carpeting he has, and the fact that he dosent have a crap load of furniture and that everything is on the ground, it gives the room a very homey atmosphere. unfortunately i have squeaky hardwood flooring and this big ass L-shaped computer desk and dresser, and a cat who sheds on Everything! im thinking about taking my bed of the frame thingy so its on the floor, and maybe even putting my TV on the floor, although i still have high furniture so ill see what i can do, it seems weird to put stuff on the floor but its pretty cool. like a japanese apartment, sure space is small, or in any studio apartment but it helps you stay organized and everything feels comfy.

stayed up playing unreal (or watching) looked at some youtube videos on the ps3, stayed up till 3 playing wipeout pulse after they went to bed, woke up at 8ish, played more wipeout pulse, watched them play RE4 (kevin kicks ass at that game, but it involves zombies and extreme kicking so it seems natural) went to the yugioh tournament and played even more wipeout pulse, ate one of those badass netcafe sandwiches and got a ride home from marvin in time to head to work, which i really appreciated.

its weird being at card tournaments, i mean, were all pretty geeky but i feel like a weirdo there (odd?). im into that kind of stuff but its so damn hard to get into, people having been playing CCG for years. ill stick with my other otaku stuff for now, speaking of which, all the doujin games finished and now its up to me to organize them all, damnit. oohh! also am getting android kikaider the animation, a 4 part ova/movie thing, i heard it sucked but it looks badass, maybe its just kikaiders style.

i gotta close tomorrow too (damnit), but i should have monday off, if not ill be fucking pissed again. the walk in registrations at MSJC are open now so im gonna go with my mom and finally sign up right there and then, hopefully all the evening classes are not taken. if im off sat. or sun. me and marvin, kevin, and some others were going to plan a trip somewhere, either the anime club store or frank and sons (hopefully frank and sons, that place sounds badass, so many figurines!)

anyways, im going to bed soon things are okish right now, of course it can only get worse...or better.........or stay the same. umm, yea.

it worsens.

2008-01-11T13:24:00.000-08:00

i really feel like shit right now. have to work at 4-9pm today, slept for 12 hours, fucked around on the pc, like always.

im going to try to eat, even though i dont feel hungry.

i wish i spent the night at romels, it would have been a little better, o well, after work were going to try and have a drink, or something, i dont work tomorrow till 5pm so i dont really care.

the feelings never too far.

2008-01-09T22:20:00.000-08:00

got off early today again, at 6:30 instead of 8pm, but i still have to be too work at 8am tomorrow.

things are getting on my nerves again, i was gonna talk about some depressing things but, fuck it. i should get to bed, soon school will start, perhaps i wont feel like shit then, its possible.

fuck.

Trip and Fall

2008-01-09T00:08:00.000-08:00

had to work at 6-10pm today, did truck, luckily they let me go early at 8:30 since it was slow. tomorrow is 12-8, then 8am-something, i close on saturday and sunday.

only a little more to endure right? id like to see someone, id consider calling people , like madison, kevin, marvin, emily or jessica, but i have no time. it would be best, to try and connect with more people, it brings a feeling of purpose and liveliness. otherwise, well, its me stuck on this computer 24/7. my passion are be crushed very quickly, i enjoy sleeping more than i do most things.

i got a debit card, so now i can pay for my ps3 repair, and hopefully buy some gundam markers, and a zeon shirt.

i shouldnt say i had more to say, that always leads to no good. this is so tiring, damn soul crushing job. btw, ever hear of a game called cave story? check it out k?

http://www.acid-play.com/download/cave-story/

day over

2008-01-08T04:09:00.000-08:00

i think ive gotten enough use out of today, or yesterday and today.
hung out with romel, played some (alot) of doujin games, went to subway and got coffee.

these doujin games are really sucking me in, i guess i could be playing them more thoroughly but this isnt something that ill just get tired of soon, it has instantly become a new hobby of mine. now that i found this site (doujinstyle.com) its all good. i feel somewhat bad about downloading all this stuff for free but its damn near impossible to get it otherwise, once in japan, ill buy tons of it for damn sure, even if ive beaten some of them.

finished genshiken too, twas sad, and sweet. makes me dream of going to comiket someday, but the comiket 73rd catalogue will have to do.

wish i had some more time in my schedule to hang out with marvin and kevin some more, its good to have friends who are geeky about things as you are, i could go on and on about these things but unless someone is as interested as i than its a waste of time.

finally, sleep, now.

a good day.

2008-01-07T02:18:00.000-08:00

got today off, must do some things, will write back soon.
too much anime, too much doujinsoft, too much games, too much models, too much music, too much hentai, not enough time.

wonder if an otakuish club in college could be anything like genshiken, so awesome.

Unghh.

2008-01-06T12:56:00.000-08:00

good morning? wahhhh! work so soon....is it raining now? it looks bad, but o well.
maybe ill have tomorrow off, so i can finally pay for my college classes and call sony to repair my ps3, these simple yet important tasks become much more troublesome when you dont feel like doin anything when you have time off.

is be tired of this. here, you can have this, whatever it is. tis fluffy.

MY HEAD A SPLODE!

2008-01-05T15:16:00.000-08:00

didnt get out of bed till 1pm today, knowing work was approaching made it too depressing.

however, i watched the new diggnation which is always a weekly highlight.
I also found something very very interesting, a torrent for 165 doujin games!!!
good god, ive not the time to comprehend all that, need, more, time!

ill probably post again after work.

lookie lookie! a girl-mecha shoot 'em up! hells yes!

http://hg101.classicgaming.gamespy.com/valstar/valstar.htm

later nights

2008-01-05T01:56:00.000-08:00

its 2am already!? can i cut this one short? plzz!?

got off at 9pm at work actually, had to do truck, broke some eggs, ate in 10mins. have eaten nothing since then.

my wrist is killing me,played too much DJ Max on pc, the pain of rhythm games!
cat scratched my wrist the other day too, holding cats near dogs is not smart, looks like a suicide attempt, is icky.

might go to romels tomorrow, depending when i wake up and how bad its raining (8hrs of sleep would be till 10am huh?)

blarghh, have a katamari.

late nights

2008-01-04T00:23:00.000-08:00

working mornings sucks ass, people get real particular about their breakfast. one man commented "2 dollars for extra Canadian bacon (on 2 sandwiches)!? i can buy allot more at the store for 2 bucks...no shit, if you buy your own stuff and make it things will be cheaper, a 1$ hamburger seems cheap but u can make it your self for less. its a goddamn fast food.
anyways, talking about work is extremely depressing, working full time at mcds is damaging.

as for my pursuit of Japanese, I'm ordering some flashcards online, seems like a simple learning tool but you cant buy them in any normal store, damn it. i should have the drive to start right now, I've got a flashcard-esque learning tool on my pc, its an rpg, 'cept with flashcards. theres not enough time to balance things out, when I'm not working i feel the urge to delve into my hobbies non-stop, that or sleep.

on a related note (sorta) my mom recorded this cop show and some college tutor got pulled over on his bike for not stopping at a stop sign, he handled the situation very maturely but what was interesting is that he was wearing a Principality of Zeon sweatshirt! dude! Zeon on American TV!? SIEG ZEON!!

got sucked into this IGPX game on the ps2, based on the show. the game isn't very good quality (who would have guessed?) but having mechs that race around and beat the crap out of each other is priceless. in fact, now that I've thought about it, this game is the closest thing to my dream game concept, except with many more mech styles, ninjas, sonic like creatures, in depth combat, and heavy rpg elements.

other than that I've been playing allot of doujin games, or Japanese indie games. that shit rocks, good ol' arcade SHUMP's. the next thing I'm trying to do is get beatmania to work on the MAME emulator. newer arcade games require a CHD (compressed hunk of data) file to work, they're a bitch to find tho, and beatmania probably won run well on this pc, o well.

gotta be at work tomorrow at 3-12pm. somehow closing may be a relief after working in the morning, bah, probably not. gonna watch some genshiken, then go to bed, within the next couple of hours.

bye-eee.

A First

2008-01-02T23:56:00.000-08:00

I had but 2 new year resolutions this year, start a blog and practice japanese everyday.
hopefully i can manage to update this every day, with something, anything, it will be a journal of sorts, one that all can see.

all of this is very hard, work drags me down, leaves me with little time, however, i start college soon, and will work only Friday, Saturday and Sunday, (or quit if need be).

realizing how important the time was when i was still in school, of course, there has always been something to drag me down. if only college will make things better, or give me some time off of work at least.

I suppose i should put up an introduction or something, however, those who read this will already know me, eventually this can be built upon, but for know, there is little energy here.

as for today, went to the mall in riverside, bought a triple dom model set, laughing man keychain, armored core figure, a ramune drink and igpx for ps2. anime club was a pretty cool store but alas, there was much of the mainstream naruto, bleach and inuyaha. not enough mecha!

its already midnight, ive gotta work tomorrow at 8am for a change, (being that i usually close now since they fired quite a few people) when time is short and restricted, it bogs down any activity, thats why i need time, to take things a more manageable pace, and hopefully do something productive, (like socializing somehow)

itd be useless to ramble on about my life story right now, lets just say, im trying to get some more free time, like i had for so many years.

my few friends, thanks for checking this out, now begins a test of willpower.
may it continue for years to come.

ps: haha, reading this is like reading an crappy engrish translation of Japanese.
well, my writing sucks but it can only get better, and ill try not to use "I" too much, its not that im self centered its just that i have a hard time writing about other things. anyways, bye